Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Day 9: Someone I wish I could Meet
This should come as no suprise but this letter is to:
Hey J (yea Im acting like I actually know you),
Since I was little I can remember watching you and telling my parents I want to be Janet when I grow up. I really felt like it was an option to become someone instead of LIKE them. I remember going to my 1st concert of yours...Rhythmnation. I will NEVER forget how in awe I was watching you. I was 10 years old. I knew every song and my parents just laughed. I thought I knew every routine but was just bouncing around with the attitude in my face. I remember wanting to go backstage to meet you but I wasnt old enough. I remember trying to get your attention like I was the only little black girl in the venue. I think thats when my parents realized how serious I was about my budding career in the performing arts. Sure they had me involved in everything (gymnastics, dance, competitive cheerleading, track, piano, acting and singing) but the 3 that stuck out to me most....I wanted to dance, I wanted to act, & I wanted to sing. Id dance in the hallway before school until my mom told me to get dressed. My dad would have me singing my lungs out after school, and I would be swearing I sounded and looked just like you. As I got older I realized It wasnt so much then that I wanted to BE you, I just wanted to be LIKE you. My mom has always been my role model, but you were and in a lot of ways still are my career idol.
From that day at your concert, I had your poster on my wall. I wasnt a crazy fan with hundreds of pictures around my room, I just had 1. Id look at it every morning and strike a pose. Im not the fan that screams and cries everytime you come across the screen. I just sit, watch and take notes. I dont think Im the 1 that would faint if I ever saw you but I may cry. Im just the 1 who smiles and supports every album & tries to learn the words to my favorite songs. I remember how heartbroken I was when your Rock Witchu Tour Show got cancelled in Miami. I had front row center tickets with the backstage passes for my mom and I. I was counting down the days. I felt like I was finally going to meet my career idol. But it never happened.... I still feel like that little girl 20 years ago that wanted so bad to just say "Hi" but now that Im a young woman I also want to say "Thank you!".
Thank you for being so open with the songs you sung. Thank you for being so free in your dancing. Thank you for being so real in your career and opening up parts of your life for the world to see. If it wasnt for you, I doubt I'd ever have come so far as a dancer. My nickname since my SR year in HS till my last day dancing on the Heat Court was LiL Janet. Its such a compliment when people say that to me because for so long I looked up to you and was always inspired. Between you and your brother Michael I think you have changed a lot of lives. I see you now acting and Im so proud like I had something to do with it hahaha. But I just see myself in a few years. Majoring in Theatre Education and Humanities from FAMU and being a part of Mahogany Dance Theatre has definitely opened a lot of doors for me. You have done so many things I can only hope and pray that I'll be able to accomplish one day, especially working with Tyler Perry. If I dont get there, at least I can say I had a good run and I tried. Ive done A LOT more than 95% of individuals in this career can say they have and thats awesome. So, in closing, I just wish one day, that I can meet you long enough to say Thank you, you are the reason I chose this career and the reason I am a dancer!
Love you lots!
Lil Janet aka Royce